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Thursday, July 15, 2010

It is not the gift but your presence 'COUNT'.

One time J asked me if he can attend the birthday party of his classmate. I 've asked the normal things like who are invited, where is the celebration and so forth. Everytime he will attend a party it is a common thing that B or myself would give him a certain amount of money. J is the one looking for a gift and would decide which one is good and appropriate for the celebrant.

Me : How much is the budget?
J : Can I have Euro 20?
Me : Is it ok if only Euro 10? I don't have enough money (kunwari).
J : (Smiled) Ok, it is not the gift but my presence counts Dad.
Me : Wow! You are that important to him?
J : Yes! And I should be proud coz I am the only 'black hair'.(meaning di puti)
Me : And how come your are important to that party?
J : I don't know, maybe maingay ako, magulo, palatawa. (loud, crazy, jolly person)
Me : You are right. (smiled)


It is really true 'it is not the gift that counts but the presence'.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

average grades in school exams, who cares!

Why is it so hard for some parents especially to a father if his son/daughter could only give an average grade? Because the expectation is so high and the tendency is making a negative comment any good relationship will be ruined.

If you are a father that is so successful from the start like getting high-flying grades, having a nice job, living in luxury, meeting famous people, being well known for some achievements blah blah, can you accept the fact that your son/daughter well give you only average grades or sometimes failing grades? A BIG NO RIGHT?

But you can accept it easily without any pain from your heart. How?

'...do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what will you drink, nor about your body, what you will put on' Matthew 6:25

Do not take the pressure upon yourself. It is not only wrong to worry, it is unbelief, worrying means we do not believe that God can look after the practical details of our kids lives.

Before : 'J how was your exam in Math?'
'Hmmmm 3.0'
'What!! You are not going to watch TV for one month and you will not get any allowance!

After: 'J how was your exam in Math?'
'Hmmmm 3.0'
'Is it really difficult? Try your best next time ok?'




Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Giving stress to your kids is not healthy, why?

Ever been asking why your kids have stomach pain? How about trouble in sleeping? And the worst terrible headache? Being a parent, it might not be good if our kids are sick. But we found out that stomach pain, trouble in sleeping and headache are symptoms of 'KID'S STRESS'. Kids can be stressed, HOW & WHY?

1. Having too much report, assignment and exams in school
2. Anxiety in reading a report in the class
3. Witnessing parents fighting for something at home
4. Experiencing the burden of a sick brother or sister at home
5. Being upset for something
6. Showing bad attitude to your kids
7. Parents divorce
8. Death of a loved one

How to avoid stress for kids?

1. If your kid feels like tired and stressed because of too much going on, let him/her drop something even for a semester.
2. Teach your kid the relaxation exercise like inhaling & exhaling slowly.
3. Being a parent, balance your life. Learn how to spend your time with the kids.
4. Have FUN with your kids.
5. Avoid blaming your kids too much.

Being a parent is not really an easy task but it could be easier if our kids stay as healthy as possible. Smile!

Monday, July 12, 2010

Budgeting is not just for women's world, it could be ours too!

For almost 5 years, buying a new house around Euro 220,000 - 300,000 is a common practice already in Vienna. People specially those migrant from Phillipines decided to be wise by investing in buying a property such as house or lot. Some friends always say 'Mahirap mag budget sa una, laging gipit kasi madaming gastusin' (It's really hard to budget at first because there are too much expenses). But is it really hard to budget? Here are my tips:

1. Joint Account vs. Not to Spend Account vs. Emergency Account

Make a joint account for your monthly salary and create other accounts for 'not to spend' & 'for emergency'. Why? In your joint account, that is where you will get all the monthly expenses for electric bill, food, mortgage, car, insurance, etc. 'Not to Spend' account is where you will save a certain amount of money like Euro 50 monthly and you can withdraw it only if your 'for emergency' account is zero balance. What is the difference between 'not to spend account' with 'for emergency'. Every 3 months or once a year there are some bills coming like car check up/repair, house repair, kids expenses (teeth, eye glass etc) and so forth, those are not in budget, so you have to get it in your 'for emergency' account.

2. WANTS OR NEEDS

Ask yourself everytime that you will make a decision to buy something if it is a need or want. A car is a need if you will use it going to your work or driving your kids to school. It will be a want if you will buy an expensive car like Euro 25,000 rather than buying a middle class car worth Euro 12,000

Buying also expensive clothes like a designer one is already a want because you can buy the same comfort of a normal shirt for only Euro 25 rather than buying a Euro 55 worth of designer shirt.

Another example is exercising, don't buy an expensive 'high-tech' machine if you can be healthy for only Euro 50 to 100. It is a need to exercise but it will be a want if you buy a Euro 1, 950 worth of gadget.

3. Food(What is necessary?What is not?)

Every family needs food to live but the average expense of it weekly could make your budgeting worse also. But just saving about Euro 20 a week, can be converted to Euro 1,000 a year and could be a budget already for a simple vacation in nearby country like UK, Italy, etc. How?

Stock up when Sale. This is applicable to those items that we use in a daily basis. Do not stock items that will be consumed only once a year, not only will it be not ideal for the space at home but also rob your spending money.

Shop where is the CHEAPEST. If you are residing in a place where there are two or three markets, compare the prices from each store and always buy items in a cheaper one. You can save at least 15%-20%. If you are spending Euro 80 per week, that will be Euro 320 per month, that will be Euro 3,840 per year and compute for 20% less, that will be Euro 768 savings a year. Can you imagine that!

Consider GENERIC BRANDS. An Italian noodle about 1000 g. cost Euro 2.99 but a generic brand which is also 1000 g. cost only Euro 0,99 . See the difference!

Use COUPONS. Some newspaper especially on Sunday publish some advertisement and coupons could be acquired. Have a little time to clip and cut some coupons. Use it for your future shopping lists.

Advance PLANNING. Buy in a large quantities and avoid convenience food, it is much expensive.


I always remember what Inay said to me 'Magtiis na nakabaluktot habang maigsi ang kumot' ('Do not spend too much if you think you are just earning a little!')





Saturday, July 10, 2010

How to cure a kid's weak lungs!

Since birth M has a weak lungs and he was even hospitalized at the age of 3 months and was given an antibiotic, sad to remember coz it was administered through vein. The needle was inserted to his vein just to have an immediate medication coz he was really in a bad condition. Every 2 months we should hospitalize him coz it was getting worse. Until it took almost 1 yr that we decided to bring him in Philippines, thingking that M might recover from 'needle stigma'. Maybe he needs fresh air & food, enough space and lots of time playing outside. Because living in a condo in Vienna has also a disadvantage for kids especially when it is cold season. Heating can cause dryness of the air we breath and it is usually not good for kids with weak lungs like M. Luckily, we have our real home (Batangas) and have a nice sea where you can enjoy swimming and having fun underneath the sun. After 1 year of almost daily visiting the sea, just having a quick dip, walking in the morning with yaya H plus some vitamins to have healthy lungs, M did not even have antibiotics for a year.


Now, M is enjoying his life in Vienna, not anymore experiencing the 'needle stigma'.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

never! (from kids' point of view)

Never...

1. Ask your kid to do their homework when you know it is Friday. In case you forgot, it is Friday, then he will look at you as if you are not his Dad and ask, 'Dad are you ok, it is Friday!'

2. Ask some favor when you know that your kids are watching their favorite show. In case you have no choice, wait until sunset (hmmmp) coz they have their own world.

3. Tell to your kid not to drink Cola and say it is not healthy because even a 5 yr old kid can validate your advise and tell you in your face, 'How come you are sleeping too late, you are surfing too much Dad, do you know that sleeping late at night is also bad for your health?' Ahmmmm... ehmmmm

4. Tell your wife that you have a salary increase in front of the kids. If they hear it, then 100 %, they will request for increase in allowance, etc. etc. etc.

5. Tell your kids that shouting with each other is not good if you yourself always love to shout as if you are talking to a deaf person.

Never underestimate your kids! They might be your mirror...

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Bonding with kids can be done in so many ways!

Due to bad weather and heavy rain shower, water goes inside our garage. The tendency for us is to clean and remove all the dirt that the water carried. We did not expect that day will be a 'bonding day' for the whole family. Would you believe that J & M also did their best to clean and have fun at the same time. It was really a funny moment coz M used a broom that is really taller than himself. He did not find it a disadvantage but a challenge to him. 'Ahhh nadulas ako!' (I slipped!) M shouted. All of us laughed. And M stood again as if nothing happened and continue his job, 'to sweep the water going to the canal'.


Working together as a family could lighten some burden in life, try it also and you will appreciate that you have kids around.


Tuesday, July 6, 2010

How to have a healthy lawn ?(from my own experience)

- Water your lawn in a longer time (1 hr minimum) and deeper coz everyday watering of lawn is not also a good idea. My tip, as long as the grass can release moisture in the morning then it is a sign that I should not water it. I water also in the morning, the best time for me is around 6:00 AM. Why? Watering in the evening might increase fungi or other grass diseases to your lawn coz it takes longer time to dry the soil.

- Do aerating once a month starting April and it is a good habit to do it before applying fertilizer to your lawn. My tip, when it is summer period (June & July), I do it twice a month. Why? Because as lawns age and sustain heavy use from play, etc. compaction can result.


- Fertilize your lawn 3 times a year. My tip, do it on April, July and October. Why? If human body needs vitamins so do our lawn. My tip again. Fertilize 2 days after you had lawn cutting. If you have some yellow spot of grass, try to use organic vegetables (not lawn) fertilizer only at the affected area.

- Lawn mowing once a week on April & May. During hot season (June, July, August) it is advisable to cut just every 2 weeks. My tip, I cut my grass not too short and I see to it that the mower blades should be always sharp before using it.


Monday, July 5, 2010

'J you should study harder coz you will have a better future!'

One of my favorite Christian book as of the moment is 'The Utmost for the Highest' by Oswald Chambers. It was given to us by our dear kumpare and kumare (J's Ninong & Ninang) and also our previous leader in CFC who has been a friend, 'guardian angel' and adviser when it comes to our personal relationship with HIM. My precious time to read this book is not bedtime, not also when alone but when I am going to work in the morning while riding in ÖBB. Imagine, 35 minutes travelling from home to office, that would be a great time for me. One of the best passage that I always admire is 'Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you' Matthew 6:33

I am a person who always worried on how to live, thingking of certain amount of money ('I must be clothed! I must be fed') Sometimes my great concern is not the kingdom of God but how am I going to take care of myself, my family, my kids, my work, etc. Jesus reversed it and He likes if I get the right relationship with God first, making it as the primary concern of our lives and never to place our concern on other things in life.

'J how come you are not so serious about your studies, you have to think son that your good future depends upon on how you studied and be focused. You will have a better future son if you have a high profession. You can buy expensive things and when the time comes that you will have your own family, they will not have a miserable life if you will study and finish a high degree' words that always came out to my mouth when J is not learning seriously. But how about God's plan, I believe He has so much good plan for J, M and for every kid out there.



Saturday, July 3, 2010

is it ok? (can be used as a replacement of PLEASE)

B and I has been married for about 12 yrs and I could say we are not exempted on trials, problem, stress with kids and we are even active serving the CFC (Couples for Christ). I admire B coz she never been so authoritive and she has been using 'IS IT OK?' as a start of a certain dialogue that needs something to be done like for some instances:

- 'Is it ok if you have time, can you throw the garbage?'

- 'Is it ok if you send some money to my parents, do we have the budget?'

- 'Is it ok if you iron also one of my blazer, if you have time please?'

- 'Is it ok if you check J's assignment? I could not do it tonight coz I will be late.'

- 'Is it ok if we attend the afternoon mass instead the morning one?'

- 'Is it ok if you lower your voice coz it will do nothing if you are shouting the kids?'

- 'Is it ok if you cook for us? We miss your style Dad.'

- 'Is it ok if you could not be a hot temper person?'

You know what, those words mean a lot to me than being an 'authoritive wife'. Sometimes even you do not like to do a request, you will be conscienced not to follow coz it has been said in a right manner.